The Addict

Recently I told my daughter I had not purchased any chips since we had returned from Canada; there were none in our home.

I was going to cut the chip habit.

"Mom," she said, "That's good.  But, honestly, I'd rather have you cut out sugar."

She had told us recently that she thinks sugar is definitely one of the deadliest poisons and its effects are very harmful over time.  Of course, drugs and tobacco are deadly, but sugar is seen as a legitimate drug and most people over use this food item.  It's acceptable to babies, toddlers, youth, teenagers, middle-aged and oldsters.  Because of this, not many - until now - talk about its adverse affects.

So, I decided to take her on.  I've given up sugar before, but always go back.  I feel like I eat it in moderation.

I've only been four days without any cookies, cakes, brownies, granola bars, hard candy, soft candy, chocolate, etc.  It's been a very miserable four days.

My sugar cravings are so intense.  I used to allow myself a piece of chocolate about 11 in the morning.  Then I would just nibble the rest of the day on some kind of sweets.  I LOVE sweets.  I'm particular about them.  I like dark chocolate - GOOD chocolate, not Hershey's.  I love Smith's mini brownies.  I love chocolate marshmallow cookies, See's chocolates, some brand of truffles, Doves dark chocolate squares.  I have candy stashed all around the house.

And, I'm suffering.  I WANT IT.

A few years ago when we were serving on our LDS Employment Mission, I met a lady who had been clean from drugs for two weeks.  I was judgmental and thought, "That's NOTHING!  You've got a long way to go!"  But, now I sing a different tune.  That's GREAT, I would say to her today.

I do not intend to give up sweets forever, just awhile, in fact.  I'm going back.  I'll control it (isn't that what they all say?)

But, I realize that I'm an addict.  It's got me by the neck.

And, my heart truly aches for anyone who is addicted to tobacco, drugs, pills, etc.  Because I have a small - just a small - inkling of how overpowering the urge to just have a taste.

I'm envious of people who don't have those strong sugar cravings...it's a sickness, almost.  And, I've got it.